Ask rather than Tell

One of the simplest yet most transformative habits a leader can develop is learning to ask rather than tell. It sounds easy, but it goes against how most of us were trained to lead. From early in our careers, we’re rewarded for knowing answers, offering solutions, and stepping in to fix problems. So, when we start leading others, we often carry that same reflex with us. But leadership that relies only on giving instructions limits the growth of others — and often adds unnecessary pressure on the leader.

Leaders who coach understand that asking good questions can be far more powerful than giving quick answers. When you pause before offering advice and instead ask, “What do you think could work here?” or “What’s the real issue underneath this?” you invite people to think for themselves. That single shift — from telling to asking — changes the quality of conversation. It turns monologues into dialogue, command into collaboration.

This approach also changes the energy in the relationship. People feel respected and heard, which builds confidence and accountability. Over time, they become less dependent on you for direction because they’ve learned to reflect, analyze, and decide on their own. That’s what developing others truly means — not creating followers who wait for answers, but partners who think independently.

Of course, asking rather than telling takes practice. It requires patience, curiosity, and a bit of self-restraint. But the payoff is immense: more engaged conversations, smarter decisions, and a culture where people feel empowered to speak and think freely. That’s the essence of coaching leadership — creating space for others to grow.